There is a solution to your dilemma: You can invite Shiraz to the dinner party, so long as you also invite Mourvedre and have Shiraz pick her up on his way over.

When Shiraz hangs out with Mourvedre, he settles down just enough to be enjoyable at dinner, without dominating the whole evening. This is surprising, since Mo is no shrinking violet. She has quite a presence of her own: deep and powerful, but lacking the spicy and almost overly gregarious personality that Shiraz sometimes has. She rounds out his rough edges, and cuts him off before he rambles on for too long.

And Shiraz is good for Mo, too. He brings a little levity in when she gets a little heavy. I see them together every once in a while, but I wish they would hook up a bit more often. They are living proof that opposites attract, and can compliment each other quite well -- even if Paula Abdul ruined the phrase "opposites attract" for us in the late '80s.

Cheers,
TSW

Shiraz is a great guy to have at a party. His forward nature and big presence make him the life of the living room, and his spicy personality keeps things just on this side of inappropriate.

If your party happens to be in the dining room, with food perhaps, Shiraz isn't always going to make the guest list. That big, spicy personality can be a bit much when trying to enjoy more civilized conversation around the table. No one wants a guest to be wearing a lampshade halfway through the soup course.

Being the person you are, though, I know you don't want to snub Shiraz and not invite him to dinner. You're friends, after all! You've shared a lot of great times together, and he was there for you when you and your ex split up. (He shouldn't have stuck around through the next morning, but you forgave him for that.)